I've been thinking a lot about how often not getting what we really want actually serves us well and in ways we can never truly anticipate. When I was in high school, all I wanted was a boyfriend. I wasted a lot of time really yearning for the adoration of a boy and for someone to be intimate with. I had a great group of friends, many of them boys, but I seemed to float in the friend zone. Looking back now, I realize that it was my own emotional blind spot that missed many connections and even unknowingly flat out rejected some male friends who I think I would have really loved to have had a close intimate relationship with. It took a billboard ad for me to even register that someone was interested in me in that way. I really just didn't get it. But looking back now, I can't imagine my formative years with a boyfriend. Not being with anyone exclusively gave me time to really get to know myself and also have a great fucking time. I was invited to everything. Road trips, concerts, camping, parties, baseball games, anything and everything. No one was stepping on any toes by asking me to go along for the ride and I was free to do whatever I wanted. In the end, not having what I really thought I wanted was the biggest gift.

The last fews days I've been wondering when I look back on this present time in my life, what will be the gift that comes from the times I haven't gotten what I thought I really wanted. It's fun to think about.

What did you learn today? Join me by using the #thesethreethings and commenting below with your own These Three Things. I want to hear what you are learning, laughing about, and living through.

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