Another These Three Things for this week. When it comes, it comes. I listen. I have a skate crew. Yep, that’s right. At 46 years old I cannot overemphasize just how hilarious this seems to me. But nevertheless, I am part of a mighty skate crew that meets weekly to cheer each other on, offer pointers and just hang out and talk about cool shit. A member of our crew is a man named Leif. He’s tall and lean with a warm smile, wears a cycling hat while he skates and drives a 1982 teal colored Camaro. With T tops. So yeah, he wins. This past weekend, my family and I cheered Leif on as he worked a...
Every once in a while living in the country surprises me. There were years where I couldn’t imagine leaving the city, let alone being married, motherhood, and driving a SUV. Add these to the long list of things my 30 year old self would have become nauseated over and I’ve managed to turn my long list of young don'ts into adult dos. And to be honest, I’m pretty happy about it. I like living in the mountains with silver haired hippies who swore they wouldn’t leave San Francisco 50 years ago. I guess we have that in common. Change is good. Or at the least very interesting. At an intersection in town that stands as a testament to...
One of my favorite psychoanalysts, Marion Milner wrote a brilliant book, On Not Being Able to Paint. The book is a result of her 1950's study focusing on creativity and the multiple forces that get in the way of its expression. It is one of my favorite books and shines a light on Milner's ability to both hold space for her own process around creativity, the process of her patients, and the process of creativity within a greater system. In my own creative process the book has been integral in moving through dry spells and reframing being stuck as just another part of the creative process. When I am stuck in process, be it creativity or life, I now have...
I’ve been spending this time in between JOY seasons doing what I call picking up feathers. Following little hints of an idea I’ve been working out in the recesses of my mind. A lot goes on in there and I require time and space to wander long enough to find a feather and then recognize that I should pick it up and learn more about it. Some feathers prove more beautiful than others and one I’ve been enamored with lately has been the act of feedback. As I’ve followed this thread here and there and under the lens of psychology I’ve learned that how the process of feedback unfolds is critically important to the psychological safety and culture of...
Let’s talk diagnosis. But first, let me backup a bit. I receive the most wonderful questions from JOY listeners and readers of this newsletter. Y’all are really paying attention and few things make me happier than answering your questions about psychology. What I didn’t know was going to happen when I started JOY, was that I would get asked quite frequently for my take on things that are floating around the psychological ether. Kind of like a myth buster. Here’s what that looks like. A DM of a post on social media that just doesn’t sit right with you. What do you think about this Lisa? Is there any truth to this? I call bullshit. Thoughts? And...
